CrazyBusy Mama! (Dot Calm)

Ideally, Christmas should be a time of joy, peace, and good family times. For many, however, financial worries overshadow the holiday, causing unneeded stress. My family and I know this stress first-hand.

Because my husband and I are both going through treatment for cancer (yes, unfortunately…both of us), neither of us are currently able to work outside the home. A side note here is that it’s been a wonderful opportunity to focus once again on my home business, but that’s a topic for another post.

So how do you take a time of year that’s stressful because of tight (or almost non-existent) finances and make it one of joy?

One big answer lies in having a frugal Christmas. Don’t believe the lies that the holidays have to be a time of extravagance. It is entirely possible to save money on your holiday meals and gifts. Following are some ways to save big money…and maybe have enough left over to buy treats for Santa’s reindeer.

1. Save moolah on your vittles. The grocery stores in your area probably send out weekly fliers (if you don’t get them in your mailbox, look in the Sunday paper). Don’t just recycle these — actually read them. I’ve saved a lot of money by utilizing these sales fliers. See which store has the best deals, and shop there. (I usually have two or three stores that I’ll bounce between — thankfully, they’re all pretty close together.) Clip coupons, too, and do so for at least three or four weeks before you plan to shop for the holiday meal. That way, you’ll have a good stash of coupons to choose from and a better chance of finding the ones you need. The week of your shopping trip, match up as many coupons as you can with the stores’ sales fliers. You could save twice on some items!

Some stores have their own coupons. My local Fred Meyer will give me a discount on something they have a coupon for even if I don’t have that particular coupon with me. All I have to do is ask.

Also, stock up on non-perishables as they go on sale in the weeks before Christmas. It’s another great way to save money, but you’ll also save yourself from the stress of “the big holiday shopping trip.”

Finally, go through your cupboards or pantry. Be creative and use what you have. Didn’t use all the cranberry sauce or pumpkin at Thanksgiving? Cranberry sauce looks just as much at home on a Christmas dinner table, and that can of pumpkin can be turned into bread, muffins, or cookies. Or pie.

2. Share the holiday meal duties. If you’re getting together with extended family, another way to save money on your holiday dinner is to make it a potluck. You can make the main dish and have others bring side dishes, drinks, and desserts. Most people love being able to contribute to the holiday meal. It will make them feel good to show off their best dish, so ask.

3. Put away the plastic! Do you max out the bank account and maybe even the credit cards when you buy Christmas gifts? Take advantage of layaway. Quite a few stores are bringing back this practice. You shop for your items, take them to the store’s layaway counter, and put down a percentage of the total. Over the following weeks you continue making payments until they’re paid off and you can take them home.

4. More creative gift buying. Purchase gifts when they’re on sale throughout the year. (Just don’t forget where you hide them!) An alternative to doing this is to set aside a certain amount of money each payday specifically for Christmas. Put the money in an envelope in a desk drawer, or better yet, in a designated savings account — where it might be a little less tempting to borrow from.

5. Homemade…and handmade…with love (or maybe just out of necessity). If you’re crafty, you can make gifts for some of the people in your life. You can put together cookie mixes in jars, coffee lovers’ baskets filled with mugs and their favorite coffee beans, scented eye pillows, etc. The sky is the limit, really. If you can make it, someone is sure to appreciate it. This is a great idea for gifts for teachers, neighbors, and others who’ve played an important part in your family’s lives throughout the year.

6. It really IS the thought that counts. Finally, if money is super tight this season, give fewer gifts to extended family and friends, or at least gifts that cost less. Do you really need to keep buying $20-30 gifts for nieces and nephews who are 18 or older? If you don’t want to stop buying for them, try giving them gift cards to a favorite store, coffee shop, or for iTunes for $5-15 instead. Look for other ways to cut costs in gift giving. Is there a friend you buy a gift for every year who never reciprocates? Perhaps this year’s gift can just be a card.

Hopefully, you’ve gotten some good ideas and have been inspired to save money this Christmas season. Make it merry!

I love your comments! What are some of your favorite ways to have a merry-yet-frugal holiday season?

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Sally Dinius is writer-in-chief here at CrazyBusyMama.com, a blog created to inspire and motivate busy mamas everywhere to feel healthy, fit, and in control of their lives. Follow her on Twitter at twitter.com/sdinius, and come join the CrazyBusy Mama Facebook page by clicking here.

I came across this post from last Christmas and decided it was definitely worth a reposting. Enjoy! – Ed.

Does this ever happen to you?

The holidays go by in a crinkly blur, and you’re left standing in the middle of wadded-up wrapping paper and worn-out decorations, scratching your head and asking:

“What in the heck just happened?”

Most of us, I think, go into the holiday season that way — we just let it happen. I’ve found, though, that the holidays I’ve enjoyed the most have been the ones I’ve taken time to plan. When I write down my Thanksgiving menu and the ingredients I need, meal prep is easier and the day is more enjoyable. Sending out Christmas cards isn’t so difficult if I make a list beforehand of who we’ll be sending them to. Having the cards, envelopes, pictures and stamps together in one box or basket that I can carry around with me (to fill them out wherever and whenever the mood strikes) is helpful, too.

Another wise practice is to keep all of your Christmas decorations in one place. My family and I broke that cardinal rule this year. I found two plastic totes in our utility room full of Christmas things (mostly my snowman collection), and various other things were in what I call our “Christmas Trunk.” It’s an old steamer trunk at the foot of our bed. Most years, it’s no big deal getting into the trunk: just flip the latches and lift the lid. But earlier this year, it was forced into double duty as a TV stand. The TV is an older one that is too heavy for me to lift on my own, so my sons helped with that.

After the totes and trunk had been gone through, along with a cupboard in our laundry/utility room, I found out why being unorganized can bite you in the rear: Our Advent wreath is missing. And because Sunday was the first Sunday of the Advent season, we weren’t able to begin our celebration, which includes candle lighting, the singing of carols or hymns, and reading Bible verses and a Christmas story or two.

The search for the wreath will continue tomorrow. Hopefully it won’t culminate with me buying a new one, because that’s when I’ll find the one that’s missing (it always works that way). And then I’ll have two.

If you’re like me and tend to let the holidays happen to you rather than the other way around, here are a few links to help you reign in some otherwise crazy days:

1. If you’re hosting a Christmas party or family get-together, Party411‘s Christmas Party Planning Guide will give you lots of ideas and help you feel at least a little bit sane. It’s a fun site to go through, so be ready to print out ideas you like — or at least have a notepad ready to write them down.

2. The interior decorating channel at About.com has a fantastic, short and simple article on how to plan for Christmas. I’m not going to recommend any other “get organized” list to you. This one’s pretty much perfect. Why? It’s the KISS principle: Keep it Simple, Sweetheart (or as I learned it years ago: Keep it Simple, Stupid…which isn’t very nice). This article tells you a few great ways to simplify without getting too complicated. I don’t know about you, but if I have too many things on my list, my brain shuts down and I start playing games on my computer. Yes, I did just admit that.

3. Once you’ve decided what you need to plan for, write it down. There are many ways to keep track of your list (or lists) electronically (such as in a note to yourself on your iPhone, et al), but I really like the good, old-fashioned write-it-down method, and I prefer to do that in a planner. The Busy Body Book is my all-time favorite planner. Each week is broken into five columns, which gives you five boxes to write in for each day. These columns can be used for anything: different family members (good for seeing what each child has going on that week at one glance), or use them to organize household tasks, work-related activities, or even…yes…the holidays. It’s very inexpensive and I think you’ll love it as much as I do.

So, if you haven’t already figured it out, the best holiday stress-reliever is…planning. Delegating follows at a very close second — please don’t think you have to do it all yourself.

Do you plan or delegate to lessen the stress of the holidays? I’d love to hear your strategies!

©2009 Sally Dinius
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Sally Dinius is writer-in-chief here at CrazyBusyMama.com, a blog created to inspire and motivate busy mamas everywhere to feel healthy, fit, and in control of their lives. Follow her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/sdinius, and come join the CrazyBusy Mama Facebook page by clicking here.

Have you ever “blessed” your family?

Dictionary.com gives several definitions for bless, but this one fits what I’m talking about best: “To confer prosperity or happiness upon.”

Frankly, at this point in time for our family, I cannot “confer prosperity” upon anyone. But I can make an effort to make someone else happy…and oftentimes, that’s easier to do than we think.

I desperately want to be a “glass half-full” kind of person. I try; I really do. But when I am confronted by stress, anxiety, and one disappointment after another, sometimes that glass just looks empty and no one can tell me otherwise.

For a good few weeks — at least — I was in a funk…a really bad, bad mood. I was filled with worry and a host of other joy-draining emotions, and everything I looked at was seen through that drab veil.

I finally shook myself out of my fog a couple of weeks ago (though it keeps threatening to come back, I’ll admit). My 15 year-old daughter has been going through a very difficult time lately, and while listening to her pain, I realized with a start that I’d been focusing on all the things that don’t matter, and neglecting the people who do: my family.

So I stepped away from my online work for about a week (except for “checking in” here and there when I had free moments), and decided to “confer some happiness” upon my family.

How? For starters, I cleared out some clutter. Clutter is a huge stress-magnifier, and sometimes a stress-causer. We’re a family of six living in about 2,100 square feet…clutter happens. But it’s still possible to get things picked up and put in order.

I also gave some of our furniture pieces an extreme makeover with a couple cans of glossy black paint. In a day and a half, I tackled a bookcase for my four-year-old, our huge kitchen table that must weight a ton, the benches that go with it, our living room coffee table, and a small antique chest of drawers. I know that sounds like a lot of black, but trust me — it looks good. Better yet, it looks new. It’s amazing how updating and improving your surroundings can also improve your mood. It worked for us!

Besides straightening up, clearing out, and painting, I also decided to bless my family in other ways. I haven’t felt like decorating for Christmas, but did it, anyway. (Actually, my daughter started it.) We’ve been making an effort to spend time together, watching a few Christmas movies here and there, and sharing quite a few cups of hot chocolate.

Blessing your family — doing what you can to lift their mood — can mean some real work on your part, even if it’s as small as grabbing the hair on the top of your head and pulling yourself out of the pit you’re in.

If things are tough for you…as they are right now for us…don’t let the season go by in a miserable blur. The joy of this season isn’t about what you have, it’s about who you’ve got. And if you don’t have anyone to spend the holidays with, get out there and bless someone else who’s lonely and feeling down (there’s no end to the supply of lonely people).

Make an effort. Find fun activities to enjoy with your family…many are free to the public. Or stay home and play a board game while having hot chocolate (or apple cider, perhaps) and snacks.

One important thing we do to foster family togetherness during this season is to celebrate Advent. There’s just something about the tradition of it that pulls up together — the kids expect it each year…even my older ones. Because our schedules don’t always mesh, we don’t get to it every night (and when we do, not everyone is home to do it), but we do celebrate it as often as possible. My four-year-old, in fact, is very upset when we don’t!

It’s less than two weeks until Christmas. That may not seem like much time…and I guess it isn’t…but it’s plenty of time to make a few memories.

Now go on — you’ve got a family to bless.

©2010 Sally Dinius
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Sally Dinius is writer-in-chief here at CrazyBusyMama.com, a blog created to inspire and motivate busy mamas everywhere to feel healthy, fit, and in control of their lives. Follow her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/sdinius, and come join the CrazyBusy Mama Facebook page by clicking here.

I wrote this article a couple of years ago for my article site, Dedicated PLR. It’s one of my favorite articles — probably because it’s about Santa — and I wanted to share it with you today. I usually sell it in a pack with other articles, but am posting it today for free as my Christmas gift to you. Grab a hot cup of tea or cocoa and enjoy! Your kids might even have fun hearing about the jolly old elf’s earlier days. You can also click here to send this page to a friend. – Ed.

Most children the world over have heard of Santa Claus, or a variation of him. In America, he’s imagined to be an immortal old man who lives at the North Pole and makes toys to give to children each Christmas Eve. We see him in books and movies as a rotund, jolly old soul, his white beard flowing over a red suit trimmed with fur and gold buttons. And, of course, always chortling that merry greeting: “Ho! Ho! Ho!”

You may be surprised to learn that Santa Claus hasn’t always been Santa Claus. He has quite a history, beginning in present-day Turkey. But first, let’s start in the New World.

The legend of “Sinterklaas” (sounds a lot like “Santa Claus,” doesn’t it?) was brought to New York by Dutch settlers in the 1600s. The Dutch first called him “Sint Nicolaas,” which eventually evolved into Sinterklaas.

Sinterklaas had a sidekick (companion) named Black Peter. Tall and lanky with dark hair and skin, he was the physical opposite of Sinterklaas in looks and was believed to give punishments to Dutch children who’d misbehaved. He also sported a large sack that many children were afraid of, believing he carried naughty little ones away in it. He was also said to hand out coal, which birthed the tradition of mischievous children finding coal in their stockings on Christmas morning. In a way, Sinterklaas and Black Peter were the “good cop/bad cop” of their time.

The Feast of Sinterklaas is celebrated in most Roman Catholic countries on December 6 and is primarily a celebration for young children. The Eve of the Feast of Sinterklaas, on December 5, is celebrated in lowland countries – such as The Netherlands – by all ages, including the religious and non-religious. People give gifts, poke fun at each other, and generally just have a good time on this day.

Saint Nicholas, the man from whom the legend grew, began life simply as Nicholas in AD 271 on the southern coast of what is now Turkey (at the time, the land belonged to Greece). The son of wealthy parents who raised him to be a devout Christian, he found himself orphaned at a young age when they died in an epidemic. He became a priest and dedicated his life to using his wealth to help those less fortunate.

One popular story tells how Nicholas saved three sisters from being sold into slavery. Their father couldn’t afford dowries for them, and without a dowry it was almost impossible to find a husband. It’s said that Nicholas, who was fond of throwing gifts through open windows, threw a bag of gold into their house on three separate occasions, landing in either the girls’ stockings or shoes. This kind and selfless act saved three sisters from the auction block, and also began the tradition of children putting out stockings for Saint Nicholas to fill.

Nicholas the priest eventually became the Archbishop of Myra (now Demre, Turkey, near Anatolia), making him the youngest archbishop of his day. He lived during the reign of the Roman Emperor Diocletian, who began persecuting and locking up the clergy while robbers and murderers ran free. Nicholas was imprisoned for a time, but eventually released.

After his time in prison, he attended the famed Council of Nicaea in AD 325. He died on December 6, 342 or 343 in Myra, but his remains were taken to Bari, Italy in AD 1087 after the region fell to Islamic forces. The day of his death was decreed by Rome to be his “name day,” on which the Feast of Saint Nicholas is celebrated.

Popular American author Washington Irving was the first to write about the Dutch version of Saint Nicholas in 1809 under the pseudonym Diedrich Knickerbocker. He wrote of Saint Nicholas arriving on horseback every Christmas Eve, but not accompanied by Black Peter as in the Dutch story.

The combined Dutch/American Saint Nicholas was “fleshed out” by Clement C. Moore in his classic poem, “The Night Before Christmas,” also known as “A Visit from Saint Nicholas.” From Moore’s poem we were given the names of Saint Nick’s reindeer (Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donder, and Blitzen), how he laughed, and even how he looked when he laughed. He was referred to as a “lively old elf” that entered and exited houses through the chimneys.

A famous American illustrator named Thomas Nast is the man we have to thank for the larger version of Saint Nick. Nast drew Santa for Harper’s magazine from the 1860s to the 1880s, and showed him to be rather round and filled out. His imaginative contributions of Santa working at a North Pole workshop and carrying lists of who was “naughty” and who was “nice” became staples of modern Santa lore. Santa’s girth grew again in the 1930s when ads for Coca Cola depicted him as a full-sized human rather than an elf.

But what about Rudolph? He hasn’t always been around, either. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer was created by an advertising writer for Montgomery Ward in 1939.

Find more articles like this to share with your readers at DedicatedPLR.com.
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Sally Dinius is writer-in-chief here at CrazyBusyMama.com, a blog created to inspire and motivate busy mamas everywhere to feel healthy, fit, and in control of their lives. Follow her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/sdinius, and come join the CrazyBusy Mama Facebook page by clicking here.

Thanksgiving really snuck up on me this year. It seems we’ve had so many things going on that I haven’t been able to keep track of them all and I’ve been forgetting things. (Kind of like my child on Halloween, swinging her candy bucket…something invariable falls out. My head’s like that.)

In fact, my family can be thankful this week for my iPhone. I used the alert function in the built-in calendar to remind me to take the turkey out the freezer to thaw on Monday. There’s no way I would have remembered that on my own. That phone is practically my personal assistant.

So, our turkey is thawing and I am in planning mode for what will make up the rest of our Thursday’s dinner. Here’s our very basic menu:

Turkey

Garlic mashed potatoes (a combo of russet and red)

Rosemary-sourdough stuffing (I might post that recipe, too)

Sweet potato casserole

Sauteed green beans

Cranberry sauce

Dinner rolls

Pumpkin pie

Annnnnd…I’m pretty sure I’m forgetting something.

Of course, I will do what I can to make each dish as healthy as possible. One thing I’ll be doing is substituting a healthier dish for an old, fattening, sodium-filled favorite. The old dish: Green bean casserole. The new: Sauteed green beans.

If you’d like to give my “new” dish a try, it’s very simple to throw together. Steam one package of thinly sliced green beans (the package may read “Italian cut,” “French cut,” or “French style”). In a skillet or similar pan, pour a few tablespoons of extra virgin olive oil. Let that heat for a few minutes, and add a quarter of a chopped white onion, a handful of sunflower seeds or pine nuts (sunflower seeds are cheaper), and a sprinkle of bacon bits (optional). When the onion is translucent, add the beans. Sprinkle with sea salt, black pepper, and dried garlic (or minced fresh garlic). Sautee for a few minutes longer until beans are heated through and everything is thoroughly mixed. Delicious!

Do you have plans to make your Thanksgiving dinner healthier this year? Do share!

©2010 Sally Dinius
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Sally Dinius is writer-in-chief here at CrazyBusyMama.com, a blog created to inspire and motivate busy mamas everywhere to feel healthy, fit, and in control of their lives. Follow her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/sdinius, and come join the CrazyBusy Mama Facebook page by clicking here.

With Black Friday coming up at the end of this week, most of us will be out shopping for deals (though I might stay home and just do my shopping online). This article is a quick read but packs a powerful punch of common sense that is sure to make your Christmas shopping go much more smoothly! -Ed.

By Nicole Dean

Grab a notebook. Grab a pen. It’s time to get serious about your Christmas shopping by making your list (and checking it twice).

Make a list of the people you’ll be buying for this year. Leave space between each person’s name. Now go back through the list and write down gift ideas and a rough dollar amount you’re willing to spend on each person.

Example:

1. Aunt Fran – Collects lighthouses, loves golf – $30.00

2. Beth – Candles, bath and body products – $20.00

3. Joe – Something for his new truck, loves fishing – $50.00

Bring your notebook shopping with you. It will help you to stay focused on who you need to shop for, a general idea of what you’re looking for and your price range. Making a detailed list like this will prove invaluable in keeping you organized and on budget with your Christmas shopping. As you shop, cross off each person on your list. Be sure to keep an eye open for bargains and grab a few extra gifts – there’s always that visitor that shows up that you didn’t anticipate.

Set holiday shopping goals for yourself and jot them down in your notebook.

1. I will have all cards in the mail by December 10th.

2. All of my major shopping will be done by December 15th.

3. I will not go over budget!

Making lists and setting goals for yourself this holiday will save you time and stress and allow you to enjoy the season for what it really is. If you haven’t started your shopping, start now. It’s not too late to get on track. The first step is starting your notebook, making your list and getting a plan of action.

After the holidays, store your notebook away somewhere (perhaps with your decorations). It will serve as a great reference when you’re ready to start your shopping next year.

Happy Holidays, Happy Shopping…and by keeping a Holiday Notebook – Happy You!

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Nicole Dean is a mostly-sane mom and creator of www.ShowMomTheMoney.com – a fun and informative site to help moms achieve success working from home. She invites you to learn more money-saving tricks at www.showmomthemoney.com/TimeSavers.asp.

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For more money saving Black Friday tips, see TipHero’s article, 17 Ways to Prepare for Black Friday Sales. - Ed.

By Peggy Baron

Thanksgiving can be a little stressful when you have company coming and you have to cook the whole meal. Sure the company is bringing a pie and will help with the dishes and clean up, but you’ve got a whole lot of work ahead of you when you wake up on that special Thursday morning. Don’t despair and stress – rally the troops!

If you’re reading this, you’ve probably got one or two or more children running around that house don’t you? Put them to work and give them all jobs. Just don’t mention the words “work” or “job.” Kids like to be helpful, especially when they see how much you appreciate it. Let them help!

First off, you need to have a plan. Take some time before Thursday morning to plot everything out. Of course you know what you want to prepare and serve – you do the same thing every year, don’t you? So that’s the easy part. Really look at each recipe and see what’s involved. You could probably do it in your sleep, but your kids can’t. Assign a recipe to each child, depending on their skill level. You may even want to find an easier version of the recipe. Go over the steps with your child and explain how it’s all going to work. Do kind of a foodless dress rehearsal with them.

If the child is too young to do a whole recipe, just give them certain tasks in a recipe and have them help you. Little ones can melt butter in the microwave, mash the potatoes, wash the vegetables, toss the salad, and put the marshmallows on the sweet potato casserole.

This is one meal where everything seems to happen at the same time. To help prevent this, the kids can mash the potatoes ahead and keep them warm in the crockpot, ditto with the sweet potato casserole and veggies. If you don’t have a way to keep them warm, time them to come out before the mad rush, put a lid on them and wrap them in several towels. They can stay quite warm that way. The salad can definitely be made earlier in the day or even the night before.

Try to schedule the prep time so there aren’t too many people walking around the kitchen with sharp knives at once.

What about the pies? Kids love to make the pies! Go with the pre-made pie crusts if their pastry skills aren’t quite up to snuff. Maybe they could pick the pies they want this year and shake tradition up a bit. I’m sure a Chocolate Dream pie is a tradition in someone’s home even if it isn’t (yet) in yours.

Keep one step ahead of total chaos by having someone wash the dirty dishes that are accumulating. Perhaps those who are watching football on TV could lend a hand! Not only will there be fewer dishes to do at the end, but it leaves lots more room for the cooks to prepare the grand feast.

If you give it some thought and plan ahead of time, this Thanksgiving could be a lot easier on you and a heck of a lot more fun for the whole family. Have a good attitude and lots of patience and just enjoy yourself. Your kitchen will be filled with those you love, and that’s something to be thankful for.

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Peggy is the editor of the popular Cookin’ Kids Newsletter. Interesting themes, fun facts, silly clip art, easy recipes, kid jokes, cooking terms, and safety tips make this newsletter a hit with kids! Learn more about it at cookinkids.com.

How are you doing this holiday season? Are you looking forward to it? Chomping at the bit to get out and buy those gifts and have family over? Or are you dreading the stress and strain?

U.S. home foreclosures for the third quarter of 2010 were 1 in 139 – a huge figure – so I think I can be pretty sure that a large number of people reading this are struggling financially in some way. I’m going to be very transparent in this post. We all have struggles, and I’m not going to pretend our family is any different at this present time. After all, we all need to know we’re not alone.

I’ve been feeling for a while now that my husband and I have been involuntarily enrolled in what I call “God’s school.” We’ve been hit by this trial and that trial over the last several years, and I know for a fact that we’re supposed to be learning something from it all and not just sitting and wallowing while waiting for the sky to finish falling.

The other day, my oldest son (18) asked me what my least favorite month was. His was November because, here in the Pacific Northwest, everything outdoors is blah…gray skies, a lot of rain, and temps that still aren’t cold enough to snow. When he asked me for my response, I said, “December.” His jaw dropped as if to say, “That’s almost inhuman!” I explained that I just didn’t enjoy that month anymore because of all the stress. In fact, I dreaded it.

Now, what kind of impact did that make on my son? Sure, he’s 18, but still impressionable and still looking to me and his dad for examples in how to live. I wish I’d clapped my hand over my mouth or just fumbled through and said, “I like all the months.” Seriously – there’s nothing wrong with December or Christmas. The problem is with me and my way of looking at it.

When your kids are grown, and they look back on their lives, what will their memories be of the holidays you spent together? They may or may not remember that your family struggled financially, or the things they had to do without. If you make a big deal about it, sure…they might remember. It depends on what your focus is, how big a deal you make of it, and what you talk about. What’s your attitude? What emotions about your situation do you let your children see? Do you want them to look back and remember you as a nervous wreck, someone who was constantly depressed and despairing, or someone who tried to make the best of every situation?

Is your sadness evident on your face, or do you cheer them with a smile? (How easily we adults forget what it’s like to be a child. They feel stress, anxiety, and despair just like we do, and they feel it deeply.)

Life, after all, is full of hills and valleys. It’s like we’re each in our own car, travelling through. We don’t stay in the valleys forever…though some people tend to stop their cars and stay in the valleys longer than they should (that’s called giving up and wallowing). Life is up and down. When you’re down, have faith that the “up” will be coming soon. Start your “car” and get moving.

What you display about your situation is what your children will remember. Whether they look back and remember stress or happiness is up to you – it’s under your control. You don’t have to have a beautiful home and the ability to give them everything they ask for…you simply need to make sure that you’ve decided to be content no matter what your situation is. That is what they’ll remember.

Happy memories can be made from anything. I never lived in a grand home as a child, and it didn’t matter to me. What I do remember are the situations that made an impression on me…and the memories my parents made for me, whether they were good or bad.

I often fall into the trap of thinking that if I can’t do such-and-such with and/or for my kids, it’s not worth doing at all, and many times I find myself sulking about it deeply before I know what’s hit me. That’s just stinkin’ thinkin’ and it’s a bad habit of mine. I am determined to do things differently this year:

I’m going to cheerfully give to others out of what I have – however much it is – and teach my kids to do the same.

I’m going to stare in wonder with my four-year-old at the first snowflake of the season and not let other worries overshadow that little bit of joy.

I’m going to smile whether I feel like it or not.

When I feel like panicking over holiday stress, whatever its cause, I’m going to eat chocolate (just thought I’d throw that in there).

When a negative thought looms on the horizon, I’m going to “flip it” and repeat the opposite (positive) version, instead. If that isn’t possible, I’ll replace that thought with a positive thought of some kind.

I’m going to remember my priorities this holiday season: God, husband, children, others. I’m not going to let drama caused by others disrupt my spiritual peace or the good memories I plan on creating with my hubby and kids. And isn’t the holiday season the time when drama rises up? Why is that? The holidays are happier when we don’t pay attention to it or let it steal our joy.

Finally, I’m going to fill my mind with good things. We may be in different places spiritually, and that’s okay. For me, one way I fill my mind with “good things” is by reading the Bible (I’ve heard it described as the best success book around…and that’s true – it’s full of great principles).

Another way I like to fill my mind with good things is by listening to podcasts that are encouraging. Most are free on iTunes, and some you can even listen to online. I love Zig Ziglar, et al., and my new favorite is a business trainer named Dani Johnson (you don’t have to have a business to listen to her – you’ll be encouraged and inspired all the same). Listening to my favorite music is another way…talking with someone who’s positive and encouraging can help, too.

I’m going to go out of my way to make special memories with my kids: visiting Santa, making cookies, taking walks in the snow (we’re supposed to have more of the white stuff this winter…unusual for Seattle). I’m going to take my kids to Starbucks at least once this holiday season. I’m going to watch sappy, romantic Christmas movies with my husband. I’m going to drink apple cider with whipped cream and not worry about the calories.

I don’t know about you, but I feel better already. I would really love to hear about the memories you’re deciding to make this season, so please share!

And stayed tuned in the coming days — I’ll be sharing with you more ways to make the holidays bright, not just for yourself and your family, but for the less fortunate (because there’s always someone less fortunate than ourselves). Focusing on others is the perfect way to get your joy back.

©2010 Sally Dinius
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Sally Dinius is writer-in-chief here at CrazyBusyMama.com, a blog created to inspire and motivate busy mamas everywhere to feel healthy, fit, and in control of their lives. Follow her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/sdinius, and come join the CrazyBusy Mama Facebook page by clicking here.
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You may be interested in:
Grooming the Next Generation for Success by Dani Johnson. I am currently reading this very motivational and encouraging book and am having a hard time putting it down. I strongly believe it’s a must-read for EVERY parent!

It’s weird, but every year when Halloween approaches, I recall a scene from the movie, E.T.

E.T. (for extra terrestrial) came out in the theaters when I was a kid. It took place in California (of course), and I remember being a little jealous that the kids in the movie got to go trick-or-treating without jackets or umbrellas. I was California-born, but have been mostly Washington-raised, so almost every Halloween I remember has usually been a bit cold and rainy.

It’ll be that way again this Sunday — in our area, anyway — so I plan on bundling up my little Cinderella and making a quick trip to just a few houses around us. (You may remember my post from last year. She was Cinderella then, too, but this year she has a better dress!)

Anyway, the day is fast approaching, so I thought I’d share some helpful tips with you to make the day more fun (and hopefully healthy) for all.

“T-t-t-trick-or T-t-t-treat!”

Kids don’t always care about getting a little cold or wet on Halloween — they’re too focused on the prize…candy, that is. But if you do have a little goblin that gets chilly, here’s how you can make it a better experience (these tips work for parents, too).

• Take little ones to the mall…or have a Halloween party instead. Get several families together and have “candy stations” around your home. Kids can go from one station to another to get their treats. This pretty much will only work for younger children, but will still be a fun time for all.
• If you do go out, get some handwarmers. ThermaCare makes small, air-activated warmers you can keep in your pockets. Again…kids probably won’t care. These are for you, mom. Check the sporting goods area of your local superstore (Fred Meyer, WalMart, etc.) or sporting goods stores like Cabella’s, REI, Big 5, and others.
• Have some apple cider heating up in a crock pot, ready to drink when you get back home. It’ll make your house smell good, too.

Too Much Candy?

A big question on many parents’ minds when Halloween rolls around is how to keep their kids from eating all the candy they receive. Because we can’t just be mean and take it away, here are some better ideas.

• I’ve heard of parents paying their kids for the candy. Try giving them a nickel for every piece of candy they fork over. (This isn’t going to work with very little ones, however — they won’t understand and will expect to get their candy back.)
• Teach them about the dangers of eating too much sugar: diabetes, obesity, other blood sugar problems (hypoglycemia, which can lead to diabetes), inability to think clearly (not sure if that’s documented, but it happens to me), tiredness, and last but not least…cavities. Remind them of how a dentist has to take care of those cavities…with a drill. Gives me shivers just thinking about it!
• Every year, our orthodontist is sure to tell his patients to bring their candy to his office after Halloween. Not because he wants it for himself, but because he wants the kids to have healthy teeth. If I remember right, he pays around $5 a pound. I have no idea how many kids take him up on that, but it’s still a good idea. Check with your dentist or orthodontist to see if they offer a similar program.
• Make sure you have plenty of healthier treats around to tempt your kids: roasted pumpkin seeds, pumpkin bread (this is a good recipe and also includes tips for making it healthier), popcorn balls (these are made with agave nectar instead of sugar), caramel apples (or sliced apples with caramel dip). Can you think of more?

Above all, be sure to have fun and stay safe out there. The CDC has some smart safety tips here to make sure a fun night is had by all.

©2010 Sally Dinius
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Sally Dinius is writer-in-chief here at CrazyBusyMama.com, a blog created to inspire and motivate busy mamas everywhere to feel healthy, fit, and in control of their lives. Follow her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/sdinius, and come join the CrazyBusy Mama Facebook page by clicking here.

For those of us trying to watch our weight, the holidays can be tough. We find ourselves surrounded by snacks and sweets, and though we know we should eat only in moderation, emotions associated with the holiday season can blow all self-discipline out the window. If we’re sad, stressed, or frustrated, it’s easy to think, “I deserve this,” or simply, “Who cares?”

Jillian Michaels has written a great — and short — article on “4 Ways to Make Yourself Feel Better Other Than Eating. You’ll learn some ideas to help yourself soothe those emotions in ways that don’t involve food and won’t make you hate yourself the next time you look in the mirror
(you shouldn’t be hating yourself, anyway, but that’s another blog post). We all need a little TLC once in a while, and I think she’s got some ideas worth reading.

I will add one other outlet for your pent-up emotional energy that Jillian didn’t mention: exercise. I know — weird that Jillian Michaels didn’t mention exercise, but she’s so well-known now that perhaps that’s just a given.

Nonetheless — get out there and do something when those emotions have got you down (or ready to scream). I went for a run with my daughter yesterday, and boy, I felt good afterward. I felt like I’d given it my all, but actually had some energy post-running. A little while later, we drove to the mall, and the mellowness kicked in on the way there. Not a blah, depressed mellowness, but a good, peaceful feeling. It occurred to me later that it was from running. (My daughter even said, “What’s wrong with you?” I had to convince her I really was fine — just mellow!)

Read more about the benefits and basics of running here.

Yes, I know the holidays are almost over, but New Year’s Eve is still on the docket, as is New Year’s Day. If you have more get-togethers planned, take a look at Jillian’s article and remember there are other ways to soothe a sad or cranky soul than by eating.

Happy New Year!

©2009 Sally Dinius
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Sally Dinius is writer-in-chief here at CrazyBusyMama.com, a blog created to inspire and motivate busy mamas everywhere to feel healthy, fit, and in control of their lives. Follow her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/sdinius, and become a member of the CrazyBusy Mama Facebook fan page by clicking here.