Have you ever had something happen in your life that changed literally EVERYTHING!? Like the entire trajectory of your life?
For me and my kids, it was the loss of my amazing husband and best friend. If you hoped on this blog post for the first time and don't know about my precious and beloved Q you can read about his story HERE If you are a member of the unwanted club of widowhood like me, and are in desperate need of resources I urge you to check some resources HERE I am gathering for myself and for others walking this terribly difficult journey too!
Doesn't have to be a huge loss like loosing someone to change your course of life. It can be one decision stacked upon another that changes your course or how you view life from the moment going forward.
For me it was GRIEF of my PERSON that gave me grief googles.
GRIEF GOOGLES
Grief gave me new googles to look at life. I would never wish the grief of loosing someone on my worst of enemies, but the life experience after this great loss of loosing my husband has given me a new lens to see life differently. I slow down more, I appreciate more and I look at time much differently than I did before. I realize that time isn't on our side and it is the only thing in life we cannot get more of, yet as a society we waste it like it is limitless.
Why do we waste the most important thing we have? Think about it for a moment, time is the only thing we cannot make more of. We can always hustle harder and make more money but we can never make more time. We must learn how to spend our time wisely, before it's too late.
This picture below is one of me and my precious family just a few months before the unexpected passing of my best friend and my children's father- Q The best dad ever! Everything we did together as a family was BIG, even when it was small! Looking back on the life we had with Q, this is even more clear! The picture below, was his idea. He always loved to take candid fun pictures like this one, true “Q style” and I am so glad we did!
We could have said no to pictures that night as we had everything trying to work against us, but so glad we took the picture!
To be honest, this moment wasn't what it appeared to be….we had just experienced the loss of Q's father and were grieving that loss, our kids were dealing with seasons of loss in their life, and to top it off the night we decided to do pictures was 40 MPH winds on the beach and getting ready to storm. Everything was pulling us in the direction of NOT taking the picture, but for some reason we decided to in spite of the mess within and around us. In that moment, life looked differently but we quite literally decided to find “JOY” in the storm. So glad we took this picture! I get chills down my spine every time I think of the what if's of that night!
Then 6 months from this amazing imperfectly perfect family photo, is this one just 4 months after Q's passing of me and my kids trying to navigate the BIGGEST loss of our lives.
We were crumbling in this photo… but we decided to bring a tripod set it up and take the picture anyway!
Notice, I said we DECIDED to find JOY in our family picture with Q above (when all looked right) and then again months after Qs passing we DECIDED to the the picture too! YUP! It is about Proclaiming JOY over your circumstances. Counting the blessings that often look so clouded when life is thrown at you. The wind, the feel of the sand on your feet, the crashing of the waves….
Life is hard friends, but you have choices. We don't get to determine everything in our life, but one thing we do get to choose is how we respond to it!
So in spite of our struggle we allow those smiles to come and start choosing to reframe our brains around gratitude and what we can control, ourselves.
So in spite of the greatest loss of our lives, we will continue to be grateful for the time we did have together and forge ahead making new memories in honor of Q!
As I pack up this afternoon for a last minute road trip with my kids, I am reminded that time is NOT on my side. I have 4 amazing children whom are a true blessing to me so I am dedicating this season of my life to loving on them, being there for them and building those memories while there is still time…. so we are taking the trip! Lots of unknowns and questions along the way, but one thing I can hear my Q say is “figure it out”….so we are figuring it out the entire way!
I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on the list!! 🚐 Say yes and figure it out as you go!
I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on the list!! 🚐 Say yes and figure it out as you go! This is a quote that rings so true for me… well kinda two quote in one I suppose. But I told the kids that funds set aside for their dad and I to travel after we were empty nesters, we are going to use traveling together! Make a bucket list and lets make it happen!
STOP WAITING ….
Those funds sat there in hopes of a dream of traveling with my husband when the time came. Unfortunately, the time never came. So let this be your reminder to NOT wait… time is of the essence!
How many are saving for retirement in order to do all the things? TOO MANY! What if that day never comes? Now, I am not saying that you shouldn't be responsible and steward well but I am saying you will only be granted so much time with your loved ones, so whatever you say yes to you ultimately say no to so make sure that yes is your best yes!
It's not about the MONEY….it's the simplest pleasures that bring the most joy!
It's the Intentionality!
If you are reading this and saying to yourself, we don't have…. REMEMBER it is NOT about a TRIP! It is about building intentional memories and time together. Setting aside the busyness to be intentional with one another. Maybe that is a staycation or lunch at a park that is just as beautiful! Don't make it so much of what that “THING” is, rather make it about the time spent together!
This picture says it all… a simple selfie before selfies were cool of me and my Q snuggled up in his arms all the while laying on the grass. This picture (aside of having it developed..yup I am dating myself) didn't cost a DIME but it is loaded with so many memories! That is the priceless memories that I am talking about! Take the time to invest in those important relationships and be wise about your resources and the ONE you can't make more of TIME! TIME will pass wether or not you are intentional, here is your reminder to SPEND It WELL!
So take the trip Mama …
So take that trip MAMA, even if it is with PB & J's packed in a cooler to the park! Take the TIME! You only have so much time, so use it wisely mama!
I share a bit of my heart this morning below about my grief journey for those of you who want to listen in. Always appreciate a comment below if there is a hardship you are facing and need prayer too. So please feel free to comment below and let us know how you can be supported. I ask that you take a moment and pray for the comment below yours knowing full well when you leave your comment the next one commenting will be doing the same over yours.
He is RISEN MUG
NEW HE is RISEN MUG is now OUT!
GO grab it and join me for a cup of coffee each morning on socials and read and meditate on Mathew 28:6
He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay! Matthew 28:6
THIS IS WHERE OUR JOY COMES FROM!!
Take heart HE has overcome death and destruction for you to live fully in abundance!
Every morning, I wake up and share a bit of my heart on my socials. If you are not following me on instagram, you can do so HERE and in this season specifically I am sharing my grief journey. Praying that I can share hope in the midst of my pain and how you too can find purpose in the midst of your valley by remembering Whose you are and who holds you! For those who would like to take a listen you can do so below.
So thankful for your encouragement each day 🥹your support means the world to me.
I am excited to announce, I have started my very own Crazy Busy Mama mug collection. Each one of these mugs have my signature exclusive signature on them. You can check them out HERE and you can SNAG IT your favorite – Each one of my designs comes with my CBM signature with a 💗✝️ on each. I hope you enjoy having coffee with me each morning and these exclusive CBM designs encourage you to put your best foot forward each day!
Much encouragement and love-
Lori 💗✝️
