💔6 MONTHs💔 how can it be? Seems like yesterday we lost you yet seems like forever ago we miss you so much! Time has stood still for us while everyone else’s has seem to go on.
I don't know if you fell on my Crazy Busy Mama blog because you are struggling with grief too, or just happened on this blog post because of my Crazy Busy Mama recipes blog, but either way I am glad you are here. I am knew to this grief struggle, as I lost my sweet husband unexpectedly on April 9th 2024. That day marks the day my entire world came crashing down. If you are new to this section of the Blog here is Quintin's Story and the events surrounding his sudden and unexpected death.
When people ask …
How are you?
I want to scream… I AM NOT Ok- but in my suffocating grief I seem to always respond I’m fine. 😥
I realize no one likes to see broken… no one wants to feel that way either but life is full of trials of many kind that so many are trying to navigate and it is so crippling at times.
If I being honest, I am crippled most days … I share this publicly to share the real and raw of life. If you have never experienced crippling fear, anxiety or loss consider yourself truly blessed but one day you may just find yourself experiencing the deepest grief of your life and wondering how to move forward.
And I want you to remember THIS-
ITS OK TO NOT BE OK!
I want this picture to be an example of how life is hard, it’s ok to not be ok and how we must take the time to feel the feels then get up out of bed and take that scary step- even when you don’t feel it! Healing is a process.
Trust me I am fighting for healing in my life not just for me but for my kids ❤️🩹
It’s ok to not be ok! – but I still have Hope in the hurting and you can too! 🤍
This sums up exactly how I feel 😥🙏🏻 the song “ I am Not Ok” by Jelly Roll was released a few months after Qs passing and it’s spot on from the day of our devastation of losing him to today 6 agonizing months later 💔
🎶 Here are the lyrics to the song: 🎶
I am not okay
I'm barely getting by
I'm losing track of days
And losing sleep at night
I am not okay
I'm hanging on the rails
So if I say I'm fine
Just know I learned to hide it well
I know, I can't be the only one
Who's holding on for dear life
But God knows, I know
When it's all said and done
I'm not okay
But it's all gonna be alright
It's not okay
But we're all gonna be alright
I woke up today
I almost stayed in bed
Had the devil on my back
And voices in my head
Some days, it ain't all bad
Some days, it all gets worse
Some days, I swear I'm better off
Layin' in that dirt
I know, I can't be the only one
Who's holding on for dear life
But God knows, I know
When it's all said and done
I'm not okay
But it's all gonna be alright
It's not okay
But we're all gonna be alright
Gonna be alright
Gonna be alright
I know one day
We'll see the other side
The pain'll wash away
In a holy water tide
And we all gonna be alright
I know, I can't be the only one
Who's holding on for dear life
But God knows, I know
When it's all said and done
I'm not okay
But it's all gonna be alright
It's not okay
But we're all gonna be alright
I'm not okay
But it's all gonna be alright
I Am Not Ok- Jelly Roll
This was US a year ago today …
Oh how I yearn for this time together as a family again! Life is but a vapor my friend, this was my life just a year ago today and it knocks the wind out of me. He was our MAIN Character and we have a massive void in our lives forever, but we carry the HOPE that we will see Quintin one day again and be reunited together as a family in our eternal home.
Every morning, I wake up and share a bit of my heart on my socials. If you are not following me on instagram, you can do so HERE and in this season specifically I am sharing my grief journey. Praying that I can share hope in the midst of my pain and how you too can find purpose in the midst of your valley by remembering Whose you are and who holds you! For those who would like to take a listen you can do so below.
So thankful for your encouragement each day 🥹your support means the world to me.
I am excited to announce, I have started my very own Crazy Busy Mama mug collection. With GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE is on of my signature exclusive mugs and you can SNAG IT HERE – Each one of my designs comes with my CBM signature with a 💗✝️ on each. I hope you enjoy having coffee with me each morning and these exclusive CBM designs encourage you to put your best foot forward each day!
I just want you to know that you are in my prayers. God bless
Lori, I began viewing your blog regularly about 7 months ago. You always made me smile and your energy is amazing. This piece that you wrote is so gut wrenching, and my heart hurts for you. I lost my daughter in August of 2023, and my husband last March, and the grief is sometimes overwhelming. I hope you are getting strength from your faith and all of us who are praying for you.
Eight years ago this December we lost our beloved daughter to cancer. She was only 41, single, and a mother of one. I feel your pain and most days it feels like this happened last week. You are doing so good and know that you probably will grieve forever because you loved Q that much and grief is love. Stay strong and keep pushing forward! 💔
My prayers are with you. You’re gonna be alright. My love lost his fight with cancer 1 year and 16 days since he made his High Flight to his heavenly home.
I am grateful for 60 Years of the best life with him. It feels like yesterday. Hugs for you.
Life is still hard, even after 3 years ! Still sleep on the couch 💔 hugs to you 🙏🙏🙏
Sweet Lori, even if my message never gets to you. Just know that you have touched my life. You are such an inspiration to so many. My heart goes out to you with the passing of your sweet Q. My soulmates name is also Quenton. We call him Q. Thank you for sharing your heart with all of us, you are teaching us, so well, how to grieve and strive for healing. I don’t know what I’d ever do if I lost my Q. Thank you for your honesty and showing such depth with your feelings. I believe it truly is a blessing that you are in ALL of our lives! I am grateful for finding you here on Facebook, You have a gift, you speak to our hearts, thank you, Jeri 💕💕
Praying for you and your family each time I see your posts. My heart has broken a little after following you for years and now that you share your grief with us. I continue to pray as we know God is who we find comfort in and who gives us peace. I support you and love you.
Thank you so much for writing about your feelings and what you are going through. I lost my Mom in August unexpectedly and my Dad five weeks later, last month. So I am so lost, angry and so sad. The grief sometimes is so unbearable. I look at people that are happy around me and it makes me sad and angry sometimes. It is why are people so happy when I am so sad right now. But we must keep on going until we can smile again too. I know my parents would not want me to cry and laugh and smile. Sometimes I do. But sometimes I feel guilty when I do. So reading your feelings and what you are going through makes me feel not so alone. Prayers for you and your family for strength.
Oh Lori………..I just love the pictures you put on here with Quinton in them. Your wedding picture is so precious, it actually brought tears to my eyes seeing Quinton gently cradling your neck as he kisses you. That picture speaks a thousand words and you can actually FEEL the love just by looking at that picture and the way Quinton was passionately kissing you. Your wedding gown, head piece and flowers looked SO pretty. You were a beautiful bride Lori and Quinton was a handsome, handsome groom. My heart aches for you because you lost dear Quinton. It just seems impossible that he’s left this earth so early like this. It all just seems like a bad nightmare. He left you with 4 beautiful, beautiful children and I can totally see pieces of Quinton in each of your kids. I’m so so sorry for you loss Lori, I pray that god will continue to guide and protect you and your beautiful family during this heart wrenching time that your going through. So many of us love you Lori and your so gracious for sharing your life and your family with us all. God Bless You Lori…..you have the sweetest guardian angel = Quinton watching over you and I know his is SO proud of you and the kids. Thanks Lori for having this “comment” section to comment on Lori. I & all your followers LOVE YOU LORI !!!!!